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A Tennessee man and an Alabama man were fighting in a war, and both were caught by the enemy.
"Before i put you to death," said the enemy, "do you have any last requests?"
The Alabama man said, "Could you shoot me after you play the song 'Yeah, Alabama?"
"Sure," the man agreed. "How about you?"
The Tennessee man said, "Could you shoot me before you play 'Yeah, Alabama?" |
Redneck Medical Terms I think I heard my doctor say a few of these. I actually laughed out loud on some of these....
Benign......................... What you be, after you be eight.
Artery......................... The study of paintings.
Bacteria....................... Back door to cafeteria.
Barium......................... What doctors do when patients die.
Cesarean Section............... A neighborhood in Rome.
Catscan........................ Searching for Kitty.
Cauterize...................... Made eye contact with her.
Colic.......................... A sheep dog.
Coma........................... A punctuation mark.
D&C............................ Where Washington is.
Dilate......................... To live long.
Enema.......................... Not a friend.
Fester......................... Quicker than someone else.
Fibula......................... A small lie.
Genital........................ Non-Jewish person.
G.I. Series.................... World Series of military baseball.
Hangnail....................... What you hang your coat on.
Impotent....................... Distinguished, well known.
Labor Pain..................... Getting hurt at work.
Medical Staff.................. A Doctor's cane.
Morbid......................... A higher offer.
Nitrates....................... Cheaper than day rates.
Node........................... I knew it.
Outpatient..................... A person who has fainted.
Pap Smear...................... A fatherhood test.
Pelvis......................... Second cousin to Elvis.
Post Operative................. A letter carrier.
Recovery Room.................. Place to do upholstery.
Rectum......................... Damn near killed him.
Secretion...................... Hiding something.
Seizure........................ Roman emperor.
Tablet......................... A small table.
Terminal Illness............... Getting sick at the airport.
Tumor.......................... One plus one more.
Urine.......................... Opposite of you're out.
A redneck taped toilet paper to his television.
He said, "Hey, lookie here, now we have free paper view!"
A Georgia state trooper pulls over a pickup on I-75 and says to
the driver, "Got any I.D.?" and the driver replies "Bout wut?"
Nasa goes NASCAR
We here at the redneck lounge support our 
Troops | | |
What does NASCAR stand for?
Non
Athletic
Sport
Created
Around
Rednecks
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A new law was recently passed in Mississippi:
When a couple gets divorced, they are STILL cousins.
did you hear about the $3 million Arkansas State Lottery?
The winner gets $3.00 a year for a million years.
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